/mike

I have a weird sense of humour. I’m also a people watcher. Going to the mall for me is a completely different experience than most of the typical mall denizens. They are typically there to shop and chat it up with their little cliques, whereas I go to watch these little cliques and make fun of them.

Yes, that does sound mean spirited but it’s not meant to be. I don’t degrade them or belittle them. I’m not out to cause maliciuos acts against them. What I do like to do is try to predict what I think they’ll do next or even just take a trip down memory lane and compare what I’m sure they’re thinking to the wisdom I now have — not that I claim to have much of that on a good day mind you.

Why First Year University Students?

Because generally they are fresh off the farm so to speak. Most first years are moving away from their parents, either to a new area of the city or to an entirely new city or province (or state for you Americans) for the first time. They are filled with the spirit of independence and freedom. They are the kings and queens of the world, whether you know it or not.

Why Do They Make Me Laugh?

Disclaimer: This is a pretty isolated situation and your mileage may very on the hilarity of this observation. It’s acutally more of a shake-my-head-in-shame-at-them than a laugh out loud and point.

There is a bar/pub that I used to frequent called Morgan’s. It’s located on 17th Ave, otherwise known as the Red Mile to those of you that watched hockey 2 years ago ;^) Every Tuesday a cover band called Broken Toyz plays to the enjoyment of many. This band is awesome. They play all the greats including Ozzy, Bon Jovi, Judas Priest, Metallica (old school Metallica though), AC/DC, Great White, and much, much more. For 80s children like myself and my group of friends this is as close to our nirvana as we can get in public.

Every fall, when all the new first year students arrive they inevitably find out about Tuesday night at Morgan’s. The permiation through the university is slow at first but it eventually builds to a line up at Morgan’s starting at 10pm near the end of the semester.

That’s all fine and dandy, I’m sure they just love the music as well as we do. Nope, that’s not it at all. They all pile into the bar and start drinking their buckets of Corona until the band starts playing. The second they hit the stage anyone over the age of 25 is all ears. We all join in singing all the words to all the songs being played.

Meanwhile we are getting dirty looks from the younger crowd as the watch us. They just continue about their drinking and try to talk over the band. Then a Bon Jovi (or a very recognizable Metallica/Ozzy) song will come on. Suddenly everyone in the bar is screaming out the song at the top of their lungs. We all have a great time and rock out. Then the song ends and the band plays another song. The young ones go back to their conversations and drinking.

What’s the Point of All This?

Okay, okay, I’m slowly getting to that. I guess the reason they make me laugh is simply watching them try to figure out the words to all these older songs that I’m sure their parents had exposed them to for many years. They all try to bang their heads while maintaining the air of coolness that they think they have. There are little groups of boys over here and girls over there, just like your grade school dances.

What these kids don’t know is that we don’t care what they look like. We don’t care how they dance (well, that’s another post for another day). What we do care about is how awful their head-banging is. How offbeat their arm pumping is. How lame their attempts to pick up girls on the dance floor are. I guess that’s what makes me laugh at them the most. They all mean well but try just too damn hard. Poor kids, they’ll learn someday.